Well since I consider this blog to be my own personal online journal so today is going to be a bit of me sharing about me personally. I am officially 31 weeks and 5 days pregnant. I believe I have reached the point of constant discomfort and fatigue. I have been completely exhausted since last week and it seems that no matter how much I rest or get to bed early or on time I am just tired. J.C. seems to be much more active to me than I ever remember Drew being, and he was what I consider active! He is awake and moving most of the time. He is not that bad at night except when I first lay down, but once I go to sleep he is not waking me up with horrendous kicks or anything. Of course I do get up at least once a night if not 2 or more times to run to the bathroom. Getting in and out of the bed in the middle of the night is getting complicated too. It seems no matter how I turn my body it just hurts when I go from laying down to sitting to standing. I feel like my stomach is as big and bulky as it could possible ever get and he is supposed to hang out in there for another 7 weeks! In general I am feeling pretty miserable and down right whiny today! I don't usually get like this. I am generally a "glass is half full" kinda girl. I just cannot shake this mood I am in. I do not think the weather around here is helping one bit since yesterday afternoon it was in the low 70's and today the temps are in the low 50's! Excuse me, I just checked the temp on my google homepage after typing that and it is actually only 43! That is crazy!!! I have had a dull headache all day, I am sure this can be attributed to the change in air pressure due to the drastic change in temps. I have begun to feel that I am not going to make it the next 7 weeks. With Drew my water broke 3 1/2 weeks early. Now I know that every pregnancy is different so I am not saying that means it will happen again, but I just have a feeling is all. I have found myself growing very anxious over my water breaking and if I will know it has happened if it does and if I have been having contractions and not realizing it. I know this is all crazy stuff to be worrying over but I am.
Now before I get emails, comments, and text messages of all my friends telling me to chill out and relax I have to comment on my own depressing rant that was the previous paragraph. I know that God is in control. I know that J.C. and myself rest in the palm of his hand. I know that this is normal for me to have these anxieties and to be so ready to have this baby here. I know, I know, I know and I believe it all! I am praying for God to help me snap out of my "funk". I believe that in a few days when the sun is back out and I can feel a little bit of warmth on my face that my mood will brighten. I know that the next weeks whether they be 7 or 5 will go by quickly, more quickly than I realize. I just long right now to hold him on the outside and be able to smell that sweet new baby smell and dress him in all the cute clothes that hang in his closet and just begin being a family of 4! Now I am almost crying! I don't do crying people!! Can you see how hormonal I am! This has been a long journey and yet it has gone by very quickly. I can still feel all that emotion of 8 months ago calling Jim to our bathroom to look at the faintest of lines on the pregnancy test and wondering if it could really be true! I remember vividly the day we took Drew to the park to tell him that he would be having a baby brother and watching his excitement that lasted just a few minutes as he was more excited about feeding the ducks! It is marching on by and will soon be here and before I realize it he will be turning 5 just as Drew has now done and getting ready for school in the fall. My real prayer is that I will cherish him so each day and not rush past one milestone for another. To enjoy the days that he will let me rock him gently to sleep or just sleep in my arms.
So with all that said I ask your prayers for strength and stamina for the next 7 weeks. I ask your prayers for the protection of J.C. and that all would continue to go as it should and that we will soon be holding our precious new son.
1 comment:
I will be praying for you. DO cherish each moment. I tease so much about Josh, but my baby is now 6 and I hardly remember him as a baby, because I also had Jamie to take care of. It's very natural to feel the way you are feeling. We want to encourage you with God's word, but we also want to be here for you to just rant and cry on our shoulders(even though you don't want to.) Before you know it, JC will be going to Kindergarten...I promise it goes by so fast!
Post a Comment